At What Cost This Life?

Two days ago I helped to save a man's life. He had hanged himself with two belts knotted together from the bottom of the stairs on his housing tier at the prison where I work. When Larry, the other officer, and I reached him, I lifted the inmate and and Larry pulled the belt from around his neck. We laid the inmate on the floor and he had no pulse and no breath. Larry and I performed CPR and started his heart and breathing after a couple of minutes. Then the ambulance arrived and the EMT's hauled him off to the emergency room.

This is not the first time that this particular inmate had attempted suicide by hanging. He had tried a month and a half earlier and I happened to be the officer on scene for that one too. For what reason he was back at our facility, I have no idea. The man obviously wanted to die. This was no "cry for help". These attempts were, pardon the term, dead serious. The responsibilities of my job, however, have prevented him from being successful twice. Other factors stemming from this situation are causing me a moral dilemma.

The powers that be have submitted recommendations for Larry and I to receive Lifesaving Medals or "Letters of Appreciation" or something on that order. This is what I am having a problem with: While performing the my duties as a Correctional Officer for the State of Idaho I prevented a man from killing himself. This man, as of the last updates, is now in a vegetative state. Would it not have been better just to let him die? Do I deserve a medal for this? I would rather be dead than a nothing, a shell of a human being. At what point does duty supercede personal choice? Does anybody have an answer to these questions? I sure as hell don't. Somebody help me with this. Please.

Thoughts of the day:

“Suicide is a fundamental human right. This does not mean that it is morally desirable. It only means that society does not have the moral right to interfere” - Thomas Szasz

“There is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide.” - Albert Camus